Nowadays loneliness has become
many people’s daily cup of coffee – they sip the bitterness out of it
every day. They suffer from what the pure black liquid does to them – it
sits people up in the middle of the day, feeling unsettled.
Some feel lonely from living many years alone, becoming isolated that
they feel like staying miles away from the rest of the world. Some live
right in the heart of a hot tribe, but still feel a foreigner there,
detached from others.
As loneliness is often described as a negative emotion, people feel
as blue as they are supposed to be, while experiencing it. They feel
empty inside, they walk hollow all the way, and they live with a
shadowed face and spirit. Loneliness has become a common flu of the
modern society. So how does one fix it to reinvigorate their health and
happiness?
Prescription 1: Don’t blame it. Even if
it’s a real flu, focusing on the the problem does little to rectify the
situation. Blaming how I made myself this lonely and miserable hardly
helps either. It only emphasizes the point that you are left alone,
makes you feel even desperate.
You should realize that whatever result you have right now, is all accumulated little by little from your previous choices. You made the choice, and You
are the one responsible for your current life. Accept it, and start
changing it. Every positive thing starts with an acceptance.
Prescription 2: Don’t compare. Most of the
pain comes from comparing, from our own tricky mind, rather than the
lonely situation itself. When reading books, thinking about how spending
time with a loved one eating or watching movies could be 10 times more
fun, would ruin the lovely moment of reading alone. When walking in an
exotic place, imagining only if I could come with a romantic companion,
would take away the very romantic moment you are sharing with yourself.
There will be always better things to do, more interesting stuff to
play with, if you make yourself think so. By comparing all the time, you
make yourself stuck in the vicious circle of never getting happy
enough. Stop comparing, try to enjoy the delicious pie in your hand
right now, rather than worrying about what if there’s bigger pie or more
delicious one out there. Read the books in your hand peacefully, it’s
wonderful. Walk the scene surrounds you leisurely, it’s incredible.
Whatever you are doing right now is one beautiful thing in the world.
See that, and live fully in the present.
Prescription 3: Enjoy it. Nietzsche once
said, “Whoever cannot spend two-thirds of the day alone, doing what he
pleases, is a slave.”Proper amount of loneliness is good for people
living a self-conscious life. When you are alone you will have the room
to think independently, without others’ perspectives interrupting, even
without you noticing. When you get comfortable with being yourself, you
will learn to listen to the voice inside, and follow the personal legend
that your heart resonates with. Enjoy the golden opportunity to be
alone, to behave your true self, and search the very answers you always
chased outside but actually exists inside.
Prescription 4: Tweak while living. Accept
your current situation and adjust your life towards a more balanced one,
by changing gradually. If the pie you are holding can really be
improved upon, experiment persistently till you can come up with a
better tasting pie.
Get more socialized, join the groups you feel a belonging to and
interact with people authentically. Open up your mind and deliberately
meet more people. By the law of chance, the more people you meet the
higher chance you have to dig your soul mates out. You can add more
activities and social buzzes to your current life, little by little,
till you find out the best channel to express yourself and interact with
the incredible others.
It’s part of life. When traveling, we will meet some
paths that are scenic, some paths that are just blank. They are all
parts of the journey. Don’t consider only beautiful passages deserve to
be enjoyed, and the plain un-exotic route shall be dead walked. Walk
both paths mindfully. When there’s a bright day, there comes a grey
evening. Both are golden moments of our day. Live lively during the day,
and enjoy the peacefulness out of the night. Every moment of life is
living. Don’t live alive in some moments and stay dead in the other.
Accept whatever scenario life has to offer, and act the drama out of it.
Although coffee is bitter, it is one of the most favorited drinks in
the world. Rather than resisting the bitter beverage, try to blend it
with right amount of sugar and cream. Mix it to the perfect flavor that
meets your taste and boosts your life. You will learn to enjoy the
coffee.
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