Everyday I take a break from my work when I get to the point of being
tired of what I am doing, and I usually go play basketball. The breaks
that I enjoy the most are when I am alone on the court. Uninterrupted.
I
shoot, shot after shot. I enjoy trying to perfect my shot. I have an
inner desire to become gifted. I have come to the point where I know
what I need to do to consistently make shots, but I just don’t
consistently do what I need to do.
The rim lets me know how I am doing. I love having it’s instant feed
back. The loud clang of the rim challenges me to become better, and the
soft swish of the net rewards me.
But today, I realized that the rim’s instant feed back is unnecessary.
I realized that I already knew if the shot was off course even before
it hits the rim. I know by how I feel during the shot. I know if it is
too short, or sailing wide left, and I know if the shot is perfectly on
track.
I realized that I was concentrating on the result and not on how I
felt during the shot. I was fixed on making my next shot (the
destination of the ball), but not on how I should feel during the shot
(the journey).
When I let go of my fixation on making shots and instead focused on
how I felt during the shots, an amazing thing happened. I made way more
shots. Why? I got rid of my self imposed pressure on the result, and
became free to follow how I felt during the journey. I didn’t care if I
made or missed a shot; I only cared if I was focused on feeling what I
knew I should be feeling during the shot.
Our lives are the same way. We want to succeed so badly that we
become fixated on succeeding. Our every thought and desire is to succeed
in whatever thing it is. Sometimes we want to succeed badly enough that
we do things against our conscience and better judgement. You see this
happening in our schools. Students want to pass a class without putting
in the work, so they turn to cheating, and when they aren’t caught, they
continue cheating.
The world has recently seen what this pattern of cheating leads to in
the likes of Bernard Madoff and Allen Stanford. They wanted to succeed
so badly in their financial businesses, that they lied and cheated for
decades. They took their new investor’s money and gave it to their old
investor’s, pretending that this money came from legitimate investments.
They let their fixation on succeeding rule their actions and look
what it brought. It brought devastation to thousands of honest people
who invested in their lies. It brought families heartache and
devastation.
In the words of Joshua Marcus Manuel, “It hurts to look at yourself
in the mirror and hate yourself, look into the mirror and wonder what
ever happened to that smile that used to shine so bright. When you look
at yourself, you see this version of “you” that your mind has created,
someone that has become so distant and cold that nobody wants to be
around. Empty eyes. Fragile bones. The only thing you have left are the
lies you tell yourself everyday to survive, lies that have become your
painful reality, lies that will swallow you whole and crush your
insides, lies that have turned you into someone you never wanted to be.”
Let go. Let go of those fixations that are preventing you from living
a successful life. The way to success and happiness comes from letting
go and following your heart, from being in harmony with yourself.
Look at what this did for Mother Teresa. For over 45 years, she
ministered to the poor and the sick. She lead 610 missions in 123
countries for people with AIDS, leprosy and other illnesses. She
dedicated her life to being in harmony with her conscience; she was her
best self.
What things do you need to let go of?
Let go of them.
What things does your heart ache to achieve?
Achieve those things of your heart and live a life of success in
harmony and happiness. Remember, “It is better to deserve honors and not
have them than to have them and not deserve them.” (Mark Twain) and “A
great man shows his greatness by the way he treats little men.” (Thomas
Carlyle)
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