There is so much in life that we just tolerate. Some of it we have to
deal with (taxes, bad weather, traffic). But there’s a good portion of
stuff that we tolerate even when we don’t have to. We step around
things, overlook irritations, and mindlessly accept energy drains.
Perhaps we’ve become so immune to these tolerations that we don’t
recognize the negative impact they have on us.
Sometimes just recognizing the things we are tolerating in
life gives us a renewed sense of hope and energy. If you don’t know
what’s pulling you down, it feels impossible to make your life better.
Even small changes and shifts with these life tolerations can result in
dramatic improvement in your outlook and mood.
However, when you address some of your bigger tolerations, you can
completely change the course of your life and open doors to a world of
happiness and inner peace that you didn’t know existed.
Think about the poorest of the poor, living in squalor and despair
without the hope of a better future. When they are lucky enough to see
the connection between education and life success, they have found a
portal to escape poverty and misery. It’s a huge shift.
In the same way, we must search for these portals that will allow us
to move to the next level of powerful living. Our tolerations are the
brambles and vines growing over the portal doorway. We must clear them
away to be able to open the door and walk through.
Do you want to walk through the portal to a happier life? If so, here
are 12 situations that you should never tolerate if you want to live
joyfully. See if you recognize yourself in any of these tolerations. If
so, now is the time to clear them away.
1. Unhappiness at work.
You spend nearly half of your life at your job. If you are unhappy,
do you really want to give away that much of your life? Think of the
impact it has on your emotional well-being, your health, and your
relationships. Think of the opportunities missed for doing something that you love,
that is fulfilling. Don’t settle for living this way forever. Find a
job that you love. Get more education if necessary. At the least, make
changes within your current job to lessen your unhappiness.
2. A Long Commute.
A long commute to work by car or public transportation is stressful
and empty. Hours in a vehicle adds up to days, months, years wasted in
traveling when you could be doing and living. Find a job closer to home,
or move closer to your job. Whatever your reason is for this commute,
is it really worth the lost time?
3. An Unhealthy Lifestyle.
Are you overweight? Do you smoke? Are you sedentary? Do you eat junk? Do you abuse alcohol or other substances? An unhealthy lifestyle
leads to an unhappy life. If you feel bad and look bad, you can’t enjoy
life. This is your one and only life, and your body is your sacred
garment. Take care of it now.
4. Draining Relationships.
If there are people in your life who are abusive, demeaning, angry,
hurtful, not supportive, unethical, or crazy, it is time to let them go.
You may have your reasons for hanging on, but do these reasons really
outweigh the negative impact they have on your life? At the very least,
find ways to cut back on interactions with these people.
5. A Disordered Living Space.
How you live is a reflection of who you are. You don’t need to live
in a mansion with lots of stuff, but your living space should reflect
the joy, order, and peace you want in your life. It should be clean,
orderly, and have some expressions of beauty and warmth. It should feel welcoming to you and to guests in your home.
6. Negativity.
It is around us all the time, invading our minds like termites. We
hear and see negative ideas and images on the news. Our friends and
associates share their negative stories or reactions to life events. We
hear negative lyrics in songs or watch violence and abuse in movies or
on TV. Before we know it, we feel negative and depressed about our
lives. Turn it off. Walk away. Stop listening. Instead watch, read, and
listen to uplifting and positive ideas and information.
7. Too Much Stuff.
Over the years, we accumulate. We like to buy things. We like to have
things. But these things require our time, energy, money, and effort.
They lose their shine and we lose our interest. They become a burden —
something we have to dust rather than enjoy. Get rid of this stuff and free up time and energy in your life.
8. Financial Problems.
The stress and emotional pain caused by financial problems steals
your joy and peace in life. Whatever you are doing now or did in the
past to cause the problem, do something about it now. Yes, some
financial difficulties are unavoidable, but do whatever you can to
lessen the stress, even if it means delivering pizzas for a while. If
you are over-spending, stop. Sell some things. Very few “things” are
worth the stress of money worries.
9. Living Out of Your Integrity.
Are you living in alignment with your values? Are you being true to yourself?
Do you need to apologize for something or ask for forgiveness? When you
are living outside of your integrity, it causes a disruption in your
soul and your psyche. It drains your energy, fosters guilt, and saps
your self-esteem. Get right with yourself and with others.
10. Living Without Fun.
If you life is all duty and work (even if the work is enjoyable), you are living out-of-balance. Fun and relaxation
are necessary ingredients for a full and joyful life. By removing some
of the other stresses from your life, you can make room for pleasurable
activities, travel, and entertainment. The world is your beautiful
oyster meant to be enjoyed.
11. Accepting Ignorance and Inertia.
We use both of these as excuses not to do something. We talk
ourselves into our own inability to accomplish or change because we are
afraid. We are afraid it will be hard, we are afraid we might fail, we
are afraid it won’t work. You and everyone else knows these are just
excuses to avoid. Don’t accept them anymore. Stretch yourself.
12. Lack of Communication.
In every single relationship you have, especially your primary relationship, healthy communication is
essential to your life happiness. We you aren’t communicating properly
with someone, you feel anxious, angry, frustrated, and helpless. Open,
honest, loving communication is the number one ingredient for successful
relationships. If you don’t know how to communicate in a healthy way,
then learn how to and begin to implement these skills.
Use the next few minutes to think about one area in your life you are
just tolerating. How does this toleration impact your sense of
well-being and joy? What is one action you could take today to begin to
eliminate this toleration? Even a small change can make a huge shift for
the better in your life.
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